Being a Working Mom

This is a topic that I have had on my mind since September, but after a recent visit with my sister Jess, I decided to write about it.  She asked me if being a working mom is hard.

The answer is Yes.

Being a working mom feels like juggling constantly, making compromises all of the time.  After all, there are only so many hours in the day.  It has forced my already efficient personality into over-drive.  How can I do XYZ faster and better?  There are always lunches to make, dishes to wash, laundry to fold.  The chores are always there, like death and taxes.  Then there is work.  I love my work.  I missed it much more than I thought I would, even on those stressful days.  I love that with teaching, when I am at work, I am 100% at work.  It takes up my entire focus, and I love that about teaching.  I do miss those days of play dates and such, but it also makes me appreciate the time that I do have that much more.  I cherish the time we have together and make the most of it.  When I am home, I am home.  Grading and chores wait until after bedtime.  Dave and I feel that it is of utmost important to be present.  After all, parenthood is what we longed for.

The answer is also No.

While I am more stressed out now than just about any other time in my life, I am also the most satisfied.  I am not an either/or person.  I am an AND person.  I need to have my family and my career.  It takes both of those for me to be truly happy.  I feel very lucky to have had the year with LX, but I also feel lucky to be teaching.  I just read an article about the art of "having it all," and I don't believe that it is attainable.  But if you can get most of what you want, I would say you are doing alright.

2013 Reading List and Award Winners

2013: A Year in Books

• Found, Margaret Peterson Haddix
• Juvie, Steve Watkins
• The Paris Wife, Paula McLain
• Deadly, Sara Sheperd
• Seven Minutes in Heaven, Sara Sheperd
• The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Stephen Chbosky
• Calling Me Home, Julie Kibler
• Fly Away, Kristen Hannah
• Mystic Lake, Kristen Hannah
• Murder in the Adirondacks, Craig Brandon
• This is How, Augusten Burroughs
• The Fault in our Stars, John Green
• Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close, Jonathan Safran Foer
• Blackberry Winter, Sarah Jio
• Kris Jenner . . . And All Things Kardashian, Kris Jenner
• Sharp Objects, Gillian Flynn
• Will Grayson, Will Grayson, John Green & David Levithan
• Cross My Heart, Hope to Die, Sara Sheperd
• Red Thread Sisters, Carol Antoinette Peacock
• Lone Wolf, Jodi Picoult
• Hide and Seek, Sara Sheperd
• In a Heartbeat, Leigh Anne and Sean Tuohy
• Life of Pi, Yann Martel
• Where We Belong, Emily Giffin
• Clockwork Angel, Cassandra Claire
• Just One Day, Gayle Foreman
• What Happened to Cass McBride?, Gail Giles

I am doing sub-categories since I liked most of what I read this year.

Best Book of 2013
Life of Pi, Yann Martel

Best Young Adult
Pretty Little Liars and all that followed, Sara Shepard
The Fault in Our Stars, John Green


Best Non-Fiction
In a Heartbeat, Leigh Anne and Sean Tuohy
This is How, Augusten Burroughs

Best Fiction
The Paris Wife, Paula McLain
Calling Me Home, Julie Kibler

2013 Year in Review

2013 Year in Review

1. What did you do in 2013 that you’d never done before?

This year I learned how to be a working mom.  It has been awesome to be back at school as I truly missed teaching.  It has not been without its challenges also.  Time seems to go by faster, and there are just not enough hours in the day to do all I want to do, and yet I am more fulfilled than ever.  Staying home last year was wonderful, but I was missing the deep satisfaction I get from teaching.  

We celebrated our son's first birthday and finalized his adoption.  The joy of both of these events is indescribable!

Out SAT business also got up and running this year.  It took a lot of time and effort, but it was successful in both the fall and spring.  I am just getting together our mailing for our third session.

I also began taking piano lessons from my sister Amanda!

2. Did you keep your New Year’s resolutions, and will you make more for next year? 

I didn't really make any last year, but I still need to work on my diet and exercise.  I did read a fair amount, and I semi-maintained my blog.

My resolution for 2014 is to live in a state of gratitude for all I have been given, most of which I do not deserve.  And also to not let the decisions of others make me angry.  

3. What places did you visit? 

North Carolina, Cape Cod, Maine, Vermont, Rhode Island

4. What would you like to have in 2014 that you lacked in 2013?

Nothing.

5. What dates from 2013 will remain etched upon your memory?

7/24: finalized LX's adoption
7/5: Our 5th wedding anniversary and the trip to Newport, RI
6/4: Our second nephew Peter Chase was born
8/22: LX's birthday
7/20: meeting LX's birth father
11/9-11/11: Sister's Weekend in Manchester, VT

6. What was your biggest achievement of the year? 

My biggest achievement was being me!  I am so sad to see some of my friends lose themselves as people once they became moms, and I really work hard to not let that happen.  I am still a wife, a friend, a daughter, a sister, a teacher.

  
7. What was your biggest failure?

 I have let my filter off somewhat, and I probably offended some people.  I am a fairly opinionated gal, and I sometimes struggle to keep my opinions to myself.

8. Did you suffer illness or injury?

No :-)

9. What did you get really, really, really excited about? 

LX had many exciting milestones, including walking and talking.  He is all-around adorable and fun.

I also got really excited about the travel we did this year.  While it was significantly less than last year, I did go to two new places (Manchester and Newport).  

10. Compared to this time last year, are you:

a) happier or sadder?
happier
b) thinner or fatter? 
fatter
c) richer or poorer? 

richer

11. What do you wish you’d done more of?

Honestly, writing.  I was a major slacker this year, and I could play the "I'm s busy" card, but in reality I just did not make time.  I would like to say that this year will be better, but I can't promise anything.

12. What do you wish you’d done less of?

Letting other people's decisions bug me so much.  I have a couple of friendships that are dying, and I just cannot seem to pull the plug even though I want to.  Instead I let myself linger in this unhappy, judgmental place when I would rather not be there.

13.  What were your favorite TV programs?

Breaking Bad
Big Bang Theory
NFL
Orange is the New Black
Keeping Up With the Kardashians

  
14.  What did you do for your birthday in 2013?

We all were home sick on my birthday this year!  I am guessing Dave and I went out to dinner, but I couldn't tell you when or where we went!

15.  What is a valuable life lesson you learned in 2013?

I don't write about Dave very often on here, but I re-learned that I have the perfect partner for me.  I love how we have adjusted to being parents but also still put a ton of effort into our marriage.  I feel lucky to have such a great husband, and I try everyday to show him how grateful I am.

16.  My goals for 2014:   

Be present, say thank you, love more!

Happy New Year!