I miss blogging. I wish I could say that I am too busy for it, but that would be a lie. After I get home from work, make dinner, and take care of LX, I just want to crash on the couch! I often think "I should be writing," but my DVR/football/Breaking Bad calls my name. But today I am here!
What is new with us?
LX started day care when I went back to work last month. It was a tough transition for all of us, but we are finally into a new routine that seems to work for all of us. I am home with him today because he had a high fever last night, and he is congested. Since starting day care, we have been to the pediatrician no less than 5 times. Gotta love other people's germs.
Work is going really well! It is great to be back even though I am absolutely crazy busy while I am there. My students this year are pretty great overall, and that is more than half of the battle. School has changed quite a bit in the face of the new CCLS, but I am trying my best to adapt with it while still keeping me in my instruction.
Our fall SAT classes were a success! Dave has really done a great job teaching, and I worked to market the course. While it was a smaller class than we had in the spring, it was definitely worth the effort.
I celebrated my 32nd birthday last month also. Dave and I had a nice dinner out at One Caroline while my parents watched LX. It is hard to believe that I am this old, but I am happy and healthy so I cannot ask for more!
Thanks for reading, and I will try to write again soon!
Wednesday, October 16, 2013
Thursday, September 5, 2013
Cape Cod Pics
I am so behind on my blogging. We went to Cape Cod with my parents at the end of July. It was so amazing to share with LX the Cape tradition. We hope to go for many years to come.
One Year Old!
How can it even be!? LX celebrated his first birthday a few weeks ago, and it was a magical day. Here is his 12 month picture:
Stats: 2'7" tall and 21.3 lbs. and healthy
It it getting harder to take his picture since he NEVER sits still!
I love our little family!
Fun!
He did end up eating the cake, once he learned what to do with it.
Amazing cake by Amanda.
His party was such a wonderful day! I spent more time than I care to admit on the planning of it, but you only turn one once. I wanted to celebrate our little miracle and the joy he brings to our life.
Sunday, July 21, 2013
Whoops! 10 Months!
I just realized that I never posted a 10 month update, and he will be 11 months tomorrow!
What a month for LX! He has started crawling like a maniac! He is so fast and efficient. He has learned to pull himself up to stand, and he loves to wake up and stand in his crib. He now has 6 teeth total: 2 front top, 2 front bottom, and one on either side of his front top teeth. His smile is even more adorable. He will walk if we hold his hands. He is babbling so many words, and he makes new sounds often. In fact, he is rarely silent. He loves to show people how he can make noises on his arm, and the more they laugh, the louder he does it! He continues to love the beach and exploring. He loves to explore EVERYTHING! At his 9 month appointment, he was 20.3 lbs. and 29 inches! We have a big boy! :-)
What a month for LX! He has started crawling like a maniac! He is so fast and efficient. He has learned to pull himself up to stand, and he loves to wake up and stand in his crib. He now has 6 teeth total: 2 front top, 2 front bottom, and one on either side of his front top teeth. His smile is even more adorable. He will walk if we hold his hands. He is babbling so many words, and he makes new sounds often. In fact, he is rarely silent. He loves to show people how he can make noises on his arm, and the more they laugh, the louder he does it! He continues to love the beach and exploring. He loves to explore EVERYTHING! At his 9 month appointment, he was 20.3 lbs. and 29 inches! We have a big boy! :-)
Wednesday, July 10, 2013
Vacation Pictures!
We spent 4 days with Dave's family in Maine. We had a truly wonderful time. While it was not relaxing as past years have been, LX certainly made it memorable. Enjoy!
Finalization Update!
We FINALLY have a court date! On Wednesday, July 24th and 9 am, LX will legally become our son. While he has always been ours in our hearts, it will be great to have this last legal hurdle cleared. While it has been a LONG time from the beginning of the journey to parenthood, it has been SO worth it!
He has been doing so many new things that I can't wait until his 11 month update. He pulls himself up to stand on anything he can reach. He loves to climb, which causes his Mama to panic! He is fearless. He is also a total lovey baby. Dave taught him how to give kisses, and they make me melt. We are just so in love.
He has been doing so many new things that I can't wait until his 11 month update. He pulls himself up to stand on anything he can reach. He loves to climb, which causes his Mama to panic! He is fearless. He is also a total lovey baby. Dave taught him how to give kisses, and they make me melt. We are just so in love.
Monday, June 10, 2013
My First Mother's Day!
I know this post is almost a month late, but life is hectic! My first Mother's Day was everything I hoped it would be. We started the morning off going to a new church, and we really liked it. It was the first time that Mother's Day didn't make me feel sad, just happy. We wanted to go to the lake, but the weather wasn't all that great so we just stayed home. Dave and LX gave me a plant and roses. They are just too sweet. Dave helped him finger paint a card for me that I will cherish forever.
Wednesday, May 22, 2013
9 Months!
Where has the time gone!? I feel like I say that in every update, but it is just going by so fast!
LX is amazing! He has done many new things this month including eating food, standing up with the help of furniture, and almost crawling in the typical way. He is completely mobile, but he still can't quite maneuver both arms and legs at the same time. We think he might walk first! He loves to eat. He likes carrots, squash, peas and green beans. He will also eat spinach, but it is not his favorite. He is still eating formula too while we transition to "real" food.
He loves playing in his swimming pool and taking walks. He loves exploring everything! He doesn't want to sit still, and he is always on the move. He has 4 teeth now, the 2 on the bottom and his 2 front teeth. Just when we thought his smile couldn't be any cuter, his little teeth showing make it delightful. He is still loving making music. The tambourine is his current favorite.
He looks less like a baby everyday and more like a little boy. He is just the best!
Monday, May 13, 2013
My favorite books
I have always been a re-reader of my favorite literature, and I know some people think it is strange. To me, there is nothing better than the warmth and familiarity of a good story. To that end, I will share some of my favorite reads over the years.
As a child, my favorite series was the Babysitters Club by Ann M. Martin. I must have read hundreds of these books, many more than once.
Augusten Burroughs is one of my favorite authors, and all of his books are amazing. The one I most enjoyed was Running with Scissors.
As a child, my favorite series was the Babysitters Club by Ann M. Martin. I must have read hundreds of these books, many more than once.
I Know This Much is True by Wally Lamb is another all-time favorite. I read it for the first time in high school or college, and it is a book that speaks to me in a different way each time.
My favorite young adult trilogy shouldn't come as a surprise...The Hunger Games! LOVE this series! I think I might actually be obsessed with it.
Finally, Summer Sisters by Judy Blume. As someone with two sisters with whom I am super-close, this book really resonated with me. It is so reminiscent of all of Cape Cod summers.
Friday, May 10, 2013
Writers Block
I have it. So much is going on, and yet nothing is going on. I guess I will just tell you what has been going on, and then this post will write itself.
The good:
~ My first Mother's Day is this weekend! I am super-excited. I think we may head up to the lake and try a new church.
~ The weather has been amazing. It's been in the mid-high 70s and sunny for the last two weeks. This has meant tons of walks, time at the park, and playing on the deck. Our wonderful neighbors have handed down their boys' swing set to LX so we need to move that over at some point. I also found him a baby swing for $5 at a garage sale and a pool for $20 on Craigslist.
~ LX is a real riot. Everyday he is more fun than the last. His front teeth are coming in, and he looks even more like a little boy.
~ I am so happy in our marriage. We have enough in common to keep it enjoyable and enough differences to keep it interesting. I am so excited for Dave to have more free time to spend with us.
The bad:
~ We are still not finalized. We hope to be by June. We needed to submit additional paperwork. At this point, as long as we finalize before his 1st birthday in August, I will be happy. Confession: I have already started thinking about his birthday party!
I hope you are having a good week! :-)
The good:
~ My first Mother's Day is this weekend! I am super-excited. I think we may head up to the lake and try a new church.
~ The weather has been amazing. It's been in the mid-high 70s and sunny for the last two weeks. This has meant tons of walks, time at the park, and playing on the deck. Our wonderful neighbors have handed down their boys' swing set to LX so we need to move that over at some point. I also found him a baby swing for $5 at a garage sale and a pool for $20 on Craigslist.
~ LX is a real riot. Everyday he is more fun than the last. His front teeth are coming in, and he looks even more like a little boy.
~ I am so happy in our marriage. We have enough in common to keep it enjoyable and enough differences to keep it interesting. I am so excited for Dave to have more free time to spend with us.
The bad:
~ We are still not finalized. We hope to be by June. We needed to submit additional paperwork. At this point, as long as we finalize before his 1st birthday in August, I will be happy. Confession: I have already started thinking about his birthday party!
I hope you are having a good week! :-)
Saturday, April 27, 2013
8 Months!
Sorry this post is a bit late...but LX is 8 months old!!
It has been another big month for LX! He now has 2 teeth on the bottom and his front teeth are starting to cut through. He is moving like a champ! While he isn't crawling quite yet, he is up on his hands and knees. He also uses his arms to pull himself forward and he rolls, so it is only a matter of time.
It has been another big month for LX! He now has 2 teeth on the bottom and his front teeth are starting to cut through. He is moving like a champ! While he isn't crawling quite yet, he is up on his hands and knees. He also uses his arms to pull himself forward and he rolls, so it is only a matter of time.
LX has some new activities that he enjoys. He loves going to the library and to the park. We take walks almost every day. He also loves chasing the dogs! Nothing makes him laugh harder than when one of their tails is within grabbing distance. His favorite toys are blocks, books (to chew), and anything that makes music. We have a set of baby instruments, and he loves to play the morracca and the bells. I play the harmonica and the drum and we have quite a time! He is very tactile, exploring everything with his hands. There is nothing that doesn't interest him from the carpet on the floor to whatever is on the table or in our hands!
His voice is really coming out too. He is often "talking." Sometimes if Dave and I are talking at dinner, he will kind of shout "ahhhhhhh" over us to be heard! It is so funny! He also likes to make that noise in the middle of the night for no reason. Aside from that, he is still a great sleeper. Bath is still a favorite time of day for him. We plan to take him for baby swim lessons this summer.
He is such a happy boy, and we love him so much!
Monday, April 22, 2013
You're the Result of Yourself
You're the Result of Yourself
Pablo Neruda
Don't blame anyone, never complain of anyone or anything
Because basically you have made of your life what you wanted.
Accept the difficulties of edifying yourself
And the worth of starting to correct your character.
The triumph of the true man arises from the ashes of his mistakes.
Never complain of your loneliness or your luck.
Face it with courage and accept it.
Somehow, they are the result of your acts and
It shows that you'll always win.
Don't feel frustrated of your own failures, neither unload them to someone else.
Accept yourself now or you'll go on justifying yourself like a child.
Remember that any time is good to start
And that no time is so good to give up.
Don't forget that the cause of your present is your past,
As the cause of your future will be your present.
Learn from the brave, from the strong,
From who doesn't accept situations
From who will live in spite of everything.
Think less of your problems and more of your work.
Learn to arise from your pain,
And to be greater than the greatest of your obstacles.
Look at the mirror of yourself and you'll be free and strong
And you'll stop being a puppet of circumstances.
For you yourself are your destiny.
Don't blame anyone, never complain of anyone or anything
Because basically you have made of your life what you wanted.
Accept the difficulties of edifying yourself
And the worth of starting to correct your character.
The triumph of the true man arises from the ashes of his mistakes.
Never complain of your loneliness or your luck.
Face it with courage and accept it.
Somehow, they are the result of your acts and
It shows that you'll always win.
Don't feel frustrated of your own failures, neither unload them to someone else.
Accept yourself now or you'll go on justifying yourself like a child.
Remember that any time is good to start
And that no time is so good to give up.
Don't forget that the cause of your present is your past,
As the cause of your future will be your present.
Learn from the brave, from the strong,
From who doesn't accept situations
From who will live in spite of everything.
Think less of your problems and more of your work.
Learn to arise from your pain,
And to be greater than the greatest of your obstacles.
Look at the mirror of yourself and you'll be free and strong
And you'll stop being a puppet of circumstances.
For you yourself are your destiny.
Wake up and stare at the sun in the mornings and breathe the sun
of dawn.
You're part of the strength of your life now,
Rise up, fight, walk, be sure and you'll win in life.
Don't ever think of 'fate'
For fate is the excuse of failures.
You're part of the strength of your life now,
Rise up, fight, walk, be sure and you'll win in life.
Don't ever think of 'fate'
For fate is the excuse of failures.
Friday, April 12, 2013
“It's about how you're like a lighthouse, always searching far into the distance. But the thing you're looking for is usually close to you and always has been. That's why you have to look within yourself to find answers instead of searching beyond.” ~Susane Colasanti, Waiting For You
I have had this quote saved in my draft folder for quite a few months. I love this quote, but I struggle to really write about it because in some ways it is true, and in some ways, it isn't.
I guess I will start with the ways that it is true. For me, it is a question of are we always who we are meant to be deep down? Maybe we are born enlightened and life takes it away year by year until we reach a turning point when we start getting our wisdom back. Do we unravel ourselves only to put ourselves back together? My life seems like that sometimes. When I reflect upon much of how I have lived , it seems I am spending my adult life trying to make sense of it. I think I understand, and yet I don't.
It made me think of one of my therapeutic break throughs: I was so busy trying to seem perfect so that no one would notice and point out my flaws. Back in high school and college, this was very true of how I acted and felt. As long as the facade was good, it was good. Even when it wasn't. Even when it was so far from it.
But now, it is. Now my life is SO good. It makes me feel sad for the 20 year old me who thought she had it all together. I am by no means completely together, far from it in fact. I am closer though. I don't even think that my infertility is 100% to blame for the mistakes and poor decisions in my life. I know it is a large part, but I also know that I always had a choice, and sometimes I would chose wrong just because I could. It felt like a free pass to hurt others like I was hurting. Because life, in fact, isn't fair. My life has always been a struggle between what I should do and what I want to do. Maybe everyone's is. I had operated one way for so many years that it is now a conscious choice to be kind, to listen, to be a good friend. I hope that over time it becomes second nature, like it was at one point. Maybe my new motto should be, "if you can't be nice, be quiet."
I guess we are all works in progress, and how lucky we are that we get a whole life to transform. I know it will take me a long time to get back to that girl who believed that all was fine, but I am getting there.
I have had this quote saved in my draft folder for quite a few months. I love this quote, but I struggle to really write about it because in some ways it is true, and in some ways, it isn't.
I guess I will start with the ways that it is true. For me, it is a question of are we always who we are meant to be deep down? Maybe we are born enlightened and life takes it away year by year until we reach a turning point when we start getting our wisdom back. Do we unravel ourselves only to put ourselves back together? My life seems like that sometimes. When I reflect upon much of how I have lived , it seems I am spending my adult life trying to make sense of it. I think I understand, and yet I don't.
It made me think of one of my therapeutic break throughs: I was so busy trying to seem perfect so that no one would notice and point out my flaws. Back in high school and college, this was very true of how I acted and felt. As long as the facade was good, it was good. Even when it wasn't. Even when it was so far from it.
But now, it is. Now my life is SO good. It makes me feel sad for the 20 year old me who thought she had it all together. I am by no means completely together, far from it in fact. I am closer though. I don't even think that my infertility is 100% to blame for the mistakes and poor decisions in my life. I know it is a large part, but I also know that I always had a choice, and sometimes I would chose wrong just because I could. It felt like a free pass to hurt others like I was hurting. Because life, in fact, isn't fair. My life has always been a struggle between what I should do and what I want to do. Maybe everyone's is. I had operated one way for so many years that it is now a conscious choice to be kind, to listen, to be a good friend. I hope that over time it becomes second nature, like it was at one point. Maybe my new motto should be, "if you can't be nice, be quiet."
I guess we are all works in progress, and how lucky we are that we get a whole life to transform. I know it will take me a long time to get back to that girl who believed that all was fine, but I am getting there.
Tuesday, March 19, 2013
Wise Words of Wisdom
Author unknown
If you want to fly and move on to better things, you have to give up the things that weigh you down, which is not always as obvious and easy as it sounds. Starting today, give up…
-Letting the opinions of others control your life. People know your name, not your story. They’ve heard what you’ve done, but not what you’ve been through. So take their opinions of you with a grain of salt. In the end, it’s not what others think, it’s what you think about yourself that counts. Sometimes you have to do exactly what’s best for you and your life, not what’s best for everyone else.
-The shame of past failures. You will fail sometimes, and that’s okay. The faster you accept this, the faster you can get on with being brilliant. Your past does not equal your future. Just because you failed yesterday, or all day today, or a moment ago, or for the last six months, or for the last sixteen years, doesn’t have any impact on the current moment. All that matters is what you do right now.
-Being indecisive about what you want. You will never leave where you are until you decide where you would rather be. It’s all about finding and pursuing your passion. Neglecting passion blocks creative flow. When you’re passionate, you’re energized. Likewise, when you lack passion, your energy is low and unproductive. Energy is everything when it comes to being successful. Make a decision to figure out what you want, and then pursue it passionately.
-Procrastinating on the goals that matter to you. There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them. Follow your intuition. Don’t give up trying to do what you really want to do. When there is love and inspiration, you can’t go wrong. And whatever it is you want to do, do it now. There are only so many tomorrows. Trust me, in a year from now, you will wish you had started today.
-Choosing to do nothing. You don’t get to choose how you are going to die, or when. You can only decide how you are going to live, right now. Every day is a new chance to choose. Choose to change your perspective. Choose to flip the switch in your mind from negative to positive. Choose to turn on the light and stop fretting about with insecurity and doubt. Choose to do work that you are proud of. Choose to see the best in others, and to show your best to others. Choose to truly LIVE, right now.
-Your need to be right. If you keep on saying you’re right, even if you are right now, eventually you will be wrong. Aim for success, but never give up your right to be wrong. Because when you do, you will also lose your ability to learn new things and move forward with your life.
-Running from problems that should be fixed. We make life harder than it has to be. The difficulties started when conversations became texting, feelings became subliminal, sex became a game, the word ‘love’ fell out of context, trust faded as honesty waned, insecurities became a way of living, jealously became a habit, being hurt started to feel natural, and running away from it all became our solution. Stop running! Face these issues, fix the problems, communicate, appreciate, forgive and LOVE the people in your life who deserve it.
-Making excuses rather than decisions. Life is a continuous exercise in creative problem solving. A mistake doesn’t become a failure until you refuse to correct it. Thus, most long-term failures are the outcome of people who make excuses instead of decisions.
-Overlooking the positive points in your life. What you see often depends entirely on what you’re looking for. Do your best and surrender the rest. When you stay stuck in regret of the life you think you should have had, you end up missing the beauty of what you do have. You will have a hard time ever being happy if you aren’t thankful for the good things in your life right now.
-Not appreciating the present moment. We do not remember days, we remember moments. Too often we try to accomplish something big without realizing that the greatest part of life is made up of the little things. Live authentically and cherish each precious moment of your journey. Because when you finally arrive at your desired destination, I guarantee you, another journey will begin! ♥
If you want to fly and move on to better things, you have to give up the things that weigh you down, which is not always as obvious and easy as it sounds. Starting today, give up…
-Letting the opinions of others control your life. People know your name, not your story. They’ve heard what you’ve done, but not what you’ve been through. So take their opinions of you with a grain of salt. In the end, it’s not what others think, it’s what you think about yourself that counts. Sometimes you have to do exactly what’s best for you and your life, not what’s best for everyone else.
-The shame of past failures. You will fail sometimes, and that’s okay. The faster you accept this, the faster you can get on with being brilliant. Your past does not equal your future. Just because you failed yesterday, or all day today, or a moment ago, or for the last six months, or for the last sixteen years, doesn’t have any impact on the current moment. All that matters is what you do right now.
-Being indecisive about what you want. You will never leave where you are until you decide where you would rather be. It’s all about finding and pursuing your passion. Neglecting passion blocks creative flow. When you’re passionate, you’re energized. Likewise, when you lack passion, your energy is low and unproductive. Energy is everything when it comes to being successful. Make a decision to figure out what you want, and then pursue it passionately.
-Procrastinating on the goals that matter to you. There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them. Follow your intuition. Don’t give up trying to do what you really want to do. When there is love and inspiration, you can’t go wrong. And whatever it is you want to do, do it now. There are only so many tomorrows. Trust me, in a year from now, you will wish you had started today.
-Choosing to do nothing. You don’t get to choose how you are going to die, or when. You can only decide how you are going to live, right now. Every day is a new chance to choose. Choose to change your perspective. Choose to flip the switch in your mind from negative to positive. Choose to turn on the light and stop fretting about with insecurity and doubt. Choose to do work that you are proud of. Choose to see the best in others, and to show your best to others. Choose to truly LIVE, right now.
-Your need to be right. If you keep on saying you’re right, even if you are right now, eventually you will be wrong. Aim for success, but never give up your right to be wrong. Because when you do, you will also lose your ability to learn new things and move forward with your life.
-Running from problems that should be fixed. We make life harder than it has to be. The difficulties started when conversations became texting, feelings became subliminal, sex became a game, the word ‘love’ fell out of context, trust faded as honesty waned, insecurities became a way of living, jealously became a habit, being hurt started to feel natural, and running away from it all became our solution. Stop running! Face these issues, fix the problems, communicate, appreciate, forgive and LOVE the people in your life who deserve it.
-Making excuses rather than decisions. Life is a continuous exercise in creative problem solving. A mistake doesn’t become a failure until you refuse to correct it. Thus, most long-term failures are the outcome of people who make excuses instead of decisions.
-Overlooking the positive points in your life. What you see often depends entirely on what you’re looking for. Do your best and surrender the rest. When you stay stuck in regret of the life you think you should have had, you end up missing the beauty of what you do have. You will have a hard time ever being happy if you aren’t thankful for the good things in your life right now.
-Not appreciating the present moment. We do not remember days, we remember moments. Too often we try to accomplish something big without realizing that the greatest part of life is made up of the little things. Live authentically and cherish each precious moment of your journey. Because when you finally arrive at your desired destination, I guarantee you, another journey will begin! ♥
Sunday, March 17, 2013
Adoption Musings
One topic in adoption that I haven't written about here is the Post Adoption Contact Agreement. This is a legal document that spells out the expectations for letters, phone calls, and visits. In our home state, PACA's exist, but they do not exist in the state where LX was born. Since that is the case, we do not have one. At first I thought it was bad not to have one, but in hindsight, I like it better. Not having one allows the relationship to take its natural course, whatever that may be.
Do we have a verbal agreement with LX's birth mom? YES! Will we live up to it? YES! We will because we believe it is important for him to know where he came from and to know that he was placed with us out of love. We agreed to two visits each year and we email monthly updates on his month birthdays. One aspect I like about our relationship with LX's birth mom is that is comfortable. We are in touch via email weekly. She shares with us what is happening in her life, such as getting into college and her first job. We ask her questions and tell her some of the cool things that LX is doing. She feels like a member of the family, much like a favorite cousin who you love dearly even though you don't see them often I think people may have a tough time understanding our relationship, but to us, it feels perfectly natural to have a hybrid relationship with someone who is much younger than we are. In fact, sometimes I do not even connect her with LX. That may sound crazy because I know she is his birth mom and I am grateful that she chose life and us for LX, but I like her independent of that fact. Which brings me to...
Yesterday, Dave, LX and I had a visit with LX's birth family. :-) We hadn't seen LX's birth mom since we were cleared for ICPC on September 15, so we were all looking forward to the reunion. We met up for ice cream half way between our homes. She brought her mom, her best friend, and her boyfriend. We just sat back in awe of this second family that we have, and we were so happy to see how much they love LX. His birth mom brought him two stuffed animals and an Easter basket! How thoughtful is that? Even though she isn't ready to be a mom, she sure does love our son. They must have taken 100 pictures as we shared stories of LX's latest milestones. He actually cut his first tooth that day. His birth mom was the first one to feel it, and for some reason it felt just right. Dave and I have a whole life of firsts to experience with him so it was nice that she got one as well.
Open adoption isn't for everyone, but it is working for us. I think many people fear open adoption or think it is co-parenting, which it is NOT. Unfortunately, Lifetime movies have given adoption and especially birth parents a bad rap. Believe it or not, an open adoption alleviates fears on both sides With it, we all know that we are all doing OK. We will never forget the gratitude that is owed to this young woman, and we want LX to know that we love all parts of him. He is and will continue to be a beautiful mix of all of us.
Do we have a verbal agreement with LX's birth mom? YES! Will we live up to it? YES! We will because we believe it is important for him to know where he came from and to know that he was placed with us out of love. We agreed to two visits each year and we email monthly updates on his month birthdays. One aspect I like about our relationship with LX's birth mom is that is comfortable. We are in touch via email weekly. She shares with us what is happening in her life, such as getting into college and her first job. We ask her questions and tell her some of the cool things that LX is doing. She feels like a member of the family, much like a favorite cousin who you love dearly even though you don't see them often I think people may have a tough time understanding our relationship, but to us, it feels perfectly natural to have a hybrid relationship with someone who is much younger than we are. In fact, sometimes I do not even connect her with LX. That may sound crazy because I know she is his birth mom and I am grateful that she chose life and us for LX, but I like her independent of that fact. Which brings me to...
Yesterday, Dave, LX and I had a visit with LX's birth family. :-) We hadn't seen LX's birth mom since we were cleared for ICPC on September 15, so we were all looking forward to the reunion. We met up for ice cream half way between our homes. She brought her mom, her best friend, and her boyfriend. We just sat back in awe of this second family that we have, and we were so happy to see how much they love LX. His birth mom brought him two stuffed animals and an Easter basket! How thoughtful is that? Even though she isn't ready to be a mom, she sure does love our son. They must have taken 100 pictures as we shared stories of LX's latest milestones. He actually cut his first tooth that day. His birth mom was the first one to feel it, and for some reason it felt just right. Dave and I have a whole life of firsts to experience with him so it was nice that she got one as well.
Open adoption isn't for everyone, but it is working for us. I think many people fear open adoption or think it is co-parenting, which it is NOT. Unfortunately, Lifetime movies have given adoption and especially birth parents a bad rap. Believe it or not, an open adoption alleviates fears on both sides With it, we all know that we are all doing OK. We will never forget the gratitude that is owed to this young woman, and we want LX to know that we love all parts of him. He is and will continue to be a beautiful mix of all of us.
Thursday, March 14, 2013
Gluten-Free Baked Oatmeal Casserole
Gluten-Free
Baked Oatmeal Casserole
Total Time: 50 minutes
Serves: 6
Ingredients
2 cups gluten-free rolled oats
1/3 cup brown sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 cup walnut pieces
1 cup raspberries {any berries work}
1/2 cup milk chocolate chips
2 cups milk
1 large egg
3 tablespoons butter, melted
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
1 ripe banana, peeled, 1/2-inch slices
Total Time: 50 minutes
Serves: 6
Ingredients
2 cups gluten-free rolled oats
1/3 cup brown sugar
1 teaspoon baking powder
1 teaspoon cinnamon
1/2 teaspoon salt
1 cup walnut pieces
1 cup raspberries {any berries work}
1/2 cup milk chocolate chips
2 cups milk
1 large egg
3 tablespoons butter, melted
1 tablespoon vanilla extract
1 ripe banana, peeled, 1/2-inch slices
Preheat oven to 375°F and
generously spray the inside of a 10-1/2 by 7 inch baking dish with cooking
spray and place on a baking sheet.
In
a large bowl, mix together the oats, sugar, baking powder, cinnamon, salt, half
the walnuts, half the strawberries and half the chocolate. (Save the other half
of strawberries, walnuts and chocolate for the top of the oatmeal).
In another large bowl, whisk together the milk, egg, butter and vanilla extract.
In another large bowl, whisk together the milk, egg, butter and vanilla extract.
Add
the oat mixture to prepared baking dish. Arrange the remaining strawberries,
walnuts and chocolate on top. Add the banana slices to the top then pour the
milk mixture over everything. Gently shake the baking dish to help the milk
mixture go throughout the oats.
Bake 35 to 40 minutes or until the top is nicely golden brown and the milk mixture has set. For an extra tasty top, sprinkle a tablespoon or so of extra brown sugar.
Bake 35 to 40 minutes or until the top is nicely golden brown and the milk mixture has set. For an extra tasty top, sprinkle a tablespoon or so of extra brown sugar.
Tuesday, March 5, 2013
Life Update
It has been a while since I've written so here is what we have been up to:
We started our own SAT prep classes a few weeks ago. This has been a dream of ours for a few years, and we finally did it this year. The timing was perfect with me being home to do all of the leg work, and we need the extra income since I am not working. The downside is that most of Dave's free time on the weekend is either prepping his lessons or teaching the classes. It is only an 8 week class so the madness is short-lived, but it is zany. If you don't know Dave, he is he most dedicated teacher I know. He is giving 150% at school and at our SAT classes. He is understandably exhausted and not home much.
So what are LX and I doing in all of our free time? Sadly, not a whole lot. The weather this time of year makes it impossible to get our walks in. We did join a Mom and Baby Group. While most of the activities are for older babies, we go to as many events as we can just to get out and meet people. We went to Barnes and Noble last week to play with trains and we went to the children's room at our library today. I had never been to the children's room, but LX loved it and we will be going back.
In other news, we still do not have a finalization date. This is so frustrating because our lawyer thought we would be finalized by the end of February "at the latest." I know it is a formality, but we want to have him as our son in every single way. As you know, patience is not my strong suit and I am so ready for that day to come. It will be so wonderful to be a forever family in the eyes of the law. It is funny how many people we know who assume that once TPR is signed, all is done. They can't believe that our adoption isn't a done deal yet. The good news is that it is a much better limbo to be in than waiting for TPR!
This reminds me of the sermon at church this week: the preacher was talking about prayers being answered. As I sat there with LX, it took everything in me to not stand up and introduce him as an answered prayer. Heck, he was the answer to a million prayers. She was saying how God answers prayers in 3 ways: yes, no, and not yet/not in the way you think. She stressed how difficult it is when you are given the not yet answer, but how much growth happens in times like those. I agree wholeheartedly At least with LX, it seems that all those months we waited were just preparing us. Our hearts were getting ready to be stretched beyond recognition, not just for LX, but for his birth parents and their families. We have learned what it means to be truly grateful. There have only been a few times since becoming a mom where I have felt frustrated with LX. I always stop and remind myself that I begged for this. Every day. The worst day with LX is better than the best day before him. It is pretty amazing what one little soul can do to a life.
We started our own SAT prep classes a few weeks ago. This has been a dream of ours for a few years, and we finally did it this year. The timing was perfect with me being home to do all of the leg work, and we need the extra income since I am not working. The downside is that most of Dave's free time on the weekend is either prepping his lessons or teaching the classes. It is only an 8 week class so the madness is short-lived, but it is zany. If you don't know Dave, he is he most dedicated teacher I know. He is giving 150% at school and at our SAT classes. He is understandably exhausted and not home much.
So what are LX and I doing in all of our free time? Sadly, not a whole lot. The weather this time of year makes it impossible to get our walks in. We did join a Mom and Baby Group. While most of the activities are for older babies, we go to as many events as we can just to get out and meet people. We went to Barnes and Noble last week to play with trains and we went to the children's room at our library today. I had never been to the children's room, but LX loved it and we will be going back.
In other news, we still do not have a finalization date. This is so frustrating because our lawyer thought we would be finalized by the end of February "at the latest." I know it is a formality, but we want to have him as our son in every single way. As you know, patience is not my strong suit and I am so ready for that day to come. It will be so wonderful to be a forever family in the eyes of the law. It is funny how many people we know who assume that once TPR is signed, all is done. They can't believe that our adoption isn't a done deal yet. The good news is that it is a much better limbo to be in than waiting for TPR!
This reminds me of the sermon at church this week: the preacher was talking about prayers being answered. As I sat there with LX, it took everything in me to not stand up and introduce him as an answered prayer. Heck, he was the answer to a million prayers. She was saying how God answers prayers in 3 ways: yes, no, and not yet/not in the way you think. She stressed how difficult it is when you are given the not yet answer, but how much growth happens in times like those. I agree wholeheartedly At least with LX, it seems that all those months we waited were just preparing us. Our hearts were getting ready to be stretched beyond recognition, not just for LX, but for his birth parents and their families. We have learned what it means to be truly grateful. There have only been a few times since becoming a mom where I have felt frustrated with LX. I always stop and remind myself that I begged for this. Every day. The worst day with LX is better than the best day before him. It is pretty amazing what one little soul can do to a life.
Friday, February 22, 2013
6 Months!
Dave said it best: These have been the best 6 months of our lives.
I mean, look at that face! He is pure JOY. LX has started sitting up, loves standing with help, and chatters all of the time. He is working on "HI," and when he cries, I swear he is saying "mama." Be still my heart! He is working on a couple of teeth so he has been uncomfortable lately.
We had a doctors visit today, and it went well. He weighed in at 17.1 lbs. and is 27 inches tall. His head is 45 cm. Sadly, he got 3 shots and one oral vaccine. He was pretty sleepy and crabby for the rest of the day.
One of the best parts of being LX's mom is getting him up in the morning and from nap. He gives us the biggest smile, like we have been apart for days, weeks, years rather than mere hours. Sometimes my face hurts from smiling so much. He is a miracle in every sense of the word.
Friday, February 15, 2013
My Little Valentine
I love Valentine's Day! I love that their is a holiday just for celebrating the way you feel about someone. We usually have low-key Valentine's Days, and this year was no exception. LX and I made these cute Valentines for our loved ones. They were a hit!
LX loves to dress for the occasion! He looks so big!
Dave is teaching LX how to do Valentine's Day the right way! He surprised me with a rose for each person in our family, including the dogs. I am so glad that LX has such a good dad.
I hope your day was special!
Friday, February 8, 2013
Life of Pi Review
From Goodreads:
Growing up in Pondicherry, India, Piscine Molitor Patel - known as Pi - has a rich life. Bookish by nature, young Pi acquires a broad knowledge of not only the great religious texts but of all literature, and has a great curiosity about how the world works. His family runs the local zoo, and he spends many of his days among goats, hippos, swans, and bears, developing his own theories about the nature of animals and how human nature conforms to it. Pi’s family life is quite happy, even though his brother picks on him and his parents aren’t quite sure how to accept his decision to simultaneously embrace and practise three religions - Christianity, Hinduism, and Islam.
But despite the lush and nurturing variety of Pi’s world, there are broad political changes afoot in India, and when Pi is sixteen, his parents decide that the family needs to escape to a better life. Choosing to move to Canada, they close the zoo, pack their belongings, and board a Japanese cargo ship called the Tsimtsum. Travelling with them are many of their animals, bound for zoos in North America. However, they have only just begun their journey when the ship sinks, taking the dreams of the Patel family down with it. Only Pi survives, cast adrift in a lifeboat with the unlikeliest oftravelling companions: a zebra, an orang-utan, a hyena, and a 450-pound Royal Bengal tiger named Richard Parker.
Thus begins Pi Patel’s epic, 227-day voyage across the Pacific, and the powerful story of faith and survival at the heart of Life of Pi. Worn and scared, oscillating between hope and despair, Pi is witness to the playing out of the food chain, quite aware of his new position within it. When only the tiger is left of the seafaring menagerie, Pi realizes that his survival depends on his ability to assert his own will, and sets upon a grand and ordered scheme to keep from being Richard Parker’s next meal.
My Review:
First, I must say that I cannot recall a story that has been so beautifully told. I loved how Martell takes his time weaving Pi's story in 315 pages. His attention to description and detail are second to none. I quickly fell in love with Pi, from the silly way he came to be called Pi to his deep and desperate thoughts while adrift in the Pacific. I could truly feel his grief, his fear, his longing. Just as strongly, I could feel his faith. I don't want to give too much away, but the ways in which he manages Richard Parker are nothing short of genius. It is a wonderful and inspiring tale of both physical and spiritual survival.
Richard Parker. What to say about him? His name was comical, but his ferocity was not. I found myself looking at his picture on the cover every so often in sheer awe of his size, strength, and beauty. The story was unbelievable and yet believable. I loved how Richard Parker, in essence, saved Pi. It was a poignant example of how our greatest fear can become our greatest triumph.
Here is one of my favorite parts: "I wish I had said, 'Richard Parker, it's over. We have survived. Can you believe it? I owe you more gratitude than I can express. I couldn't have done it without you. I would like to say it formally: Richard Parker, thank you. Thank you for saving my life.'"
I also loved how Pi taught me about religion, zoology and animal training. I got quite an education that I was not expecting. I found myself reading parts of the book aloud to Dave, and saying "can you believe that!?!"
To conclude, you would be crazy to not read this book.
Growing up in Pondicherry, India, Piscine Molitor Patel - known as Pi - has a rich life. Bookish by nature, young Pi acquires a broad knowledge of not only the great religious texts but of all literature, and has a great curiosity about how the world works. His family runs the local zoo, and he spends many of his days among goats, hippos, swans, and bears, developing his own theories about the nature of animals and how human nature conforms to it. Pi’s family life is quite happy, even though his brother picks on him and his parents aren’t quite sure how to accept his decision to simultaneously embrace and practise three religions - Christianity, Hinduism, and Islam.
But despite the lush and nurturing variety of Pi’s world, there are broad political changes afoot in India, and when Pi is sixteen, his parents decide that the family needs to escape to a better life. Choosing to move to Canada, they close the zoo, pack their belongings, and board a Japanese cargo ship called the Tsimtsum. Travelling with them are many of their animals, bound for zoos in North America. However, they have only just begun their journey when the ship sinks, taking the dreams of the Patel family down with it. Only Pi survives, cast adrift in a lifeboat with the unlikeliest oftravelling companions: a zebra, an orang-utan, a hyena, and a 450-pound Royal Bengal tiger named Richard Parker.
Thus begins Pi Patel’s epic, 227-day voyage across the Pacific, and the powerful story of faith and survival at the heart of Life of Pi. Worn and scared, oscillating between hope and despair, Pi is witness to the playing out of the food chain, quite aware of his new position within it. When only the tiger is left of the seafaring menagerie, Pi realizes that his survival depends on his ability to assert his own will, and sets upon a grand and ordered scheme to keep from being Richard Parker’s next meal.
My Review:
First, I must say that I cannot recall a story that has been so beautifully told. I loved how Martell takes his time weaving Pi's story in 315 pages. His attention to description and detail are second to none. I quickly fell in love with Pi, from the silly way he came to be called Pi to his deep and desperate thoughts while adrift in the Pacific. I could truly feel his grief, his fear, his longing. Just as strongly, I could feel his faith. I don't want to give too much away, but the ways in which he manages Richard Parker are nothing short of genius. It is a wonderful and inspiring tale of both physical and spiritual survival.
Richard Parker. What to say about him? His name was comical, but his ferocity was not. I found myself looking at his picture on the cover every so often in sheer awe of his size, strength, and beauty. The story was unbelievable and yet believable. I loved how Richard Parker, in essence, saved Pi. It was a poignant example of how our greatest fear can become our greatest triumph.
Here is one of my favorite parts: "I wish I had said, 'Richard Parker, it's over. We have survived. Can you believe it? I owe you more gratitude than I can express. I couldn't have done it without you. I would like to say it formally: Richard Parker, thank you. Thank you for saving my life.'"
I also loved how Pi taught me about religion, zoology and animal training. I got quite an education that I was not expecting. I found myself reading parts of the book aloud to Dave, and saying "can you believe that!?!"
To conclude, you would be crazy to not read this book.
Monday, February 4, 2013
Famous Adopted Kids
This post has been on my mind for a very long time, but the recent Superbowl coverage of two famous adoptees has pushed me to finally write it. Colin Kaepernick of the San Francisco 49ers and Michael Oher of the Baltimore Ravens were both adopted. Colin as a 6 week old infant and Michael as a teenager. If you have seen or read The Blind Side, you are probably familiar with Michael's story.
In the pre-game interviews, one of the first questions asked of Colin was a leading one that basically made him say that he was adopted. He handled it quite well, and he responded with "being adopted was the greatest blessing of my life." Many people who has been touched by adoption probably feel the same way. I know we do.
Michael takes exception to how he was portrayed in the feel good, but somewhat unrealistic The Blind Side. In a recent interview, he states that he has always been a strong athlete and that he isn't the slow-witted gentle giant that the movie makes him out to be.
Where am I going with this? I guess I don't understand why the media places so much emphasis on adoption. I feel someone being adopted is like them having brown hair or loving pizza. Would you tell everyone you meet those facts? It is one fact about their lives, but it is not the most important one. It is undoubtedly part of who they are, but it is not the sum of their being.
Another frustration is when Colin's parents were introduced as his "adoptive" parents, almost as if this is somehow less of a parent. To me, a parent is someone who builds you up, takes are of you, and loves you more than life. Whether a child lives with biological or adoptive parents, I am pretty sure that ALL parents feel that way about their kids.
I am glad that adoption is becoming more out in the open, but I wish it didn't have to be the headline. In case you didn't notice, Michael and Colin are pretty awesome athletes and nice guys. Why isn't that the headline?
In the pre-game interviews, one of the first questions asked of Colin was a leading one that basically made him say that he was adopted. He handled it quite well, and he responded with "being adopted was the greatest blessing of my life." Many people who has been touched by adoption probably feel the same way. I know we do.
Michael takes exception to how he was portrayed in the feel good, but somewhat unrealistic The Blind Side. In a recent interview, he states that he has always been a strong athlete and that he isn't the slow-witted gentle giant that the movie makes him out to be.
Where am I going with this? I guess I don't understand why the media places so much emphasis on adoption. I feel someone being adopted is like them having brown hair or loving pizza. Would you tell everyone you meet those facts? It is one fact about their lives, but it is not the most important one. It is undoubtedly part of who they are, but it is not the sum of their being.
Another frustration is when Colin's parents were introduced as his "adoptive" parents, almost as if this is somehow less of a parent. To me, a parent is someone who builds you up, takes are of you, and loves you more than life. Whether a child lives with biological or adoptive parents, I am pretty sure that ALL parents feel that way about their kids.
I am glad that adoption is becoming more out in the open, but I wish it didn't have to be the headline. In case you didn't notice, Michael and Colin are pretty awesome athletes and nice guys. Why isn't that the headline?
Tuesday, January 29, 2013
10 Thoughts on Whole Living
1. "You can't stop the waves, but you can learn to surf." --Mindfulness expert Jon Kabat-Zinn
2. We'll always love confident talkers, but we're appreciating confident listeners more and more.
3. Animals bring a lot of joy to the world. It's high time we gave them a better deal in return.
4. Out: Perfumes that smell like eau de chemicals In: Fragrances redolent of real ingredients
5. Cool, misty, calm, peaceful: sometimes being in the fog isn't such a bad thing.
6. Dogs, with their perpetual today-is-the-best-day-ever attitude, could teach us a thing or two.
7. Resolve to remember how great we feel time we exercise--the next time we're piling up excuses for why we can't work out.
8. The foods that are good for us actually leave us feeling good. Love how nature does that!
9. "The time is always right to do the right thing." Thank you Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., for being as relevant as you've always been.
10. When life hands you lemons, roast them chickens and potatoes.
2. We'll always love confident talkers, but we're appreciating confident listeners more and more.
3. Animals bring a lot of joy to the world. It's high time we gave them a better deal in return.
4. Out: Perfumes that smell like eau de chemicals In: Fragrances redolent of real ingredients
5. Cool, misty, calm, peaceful: sometimes being in the fog isn't such a bad thing.
6. Dogs, with their perpetual today-is-the-best-day-ever attitude, could teach us a thing or two.
7. Resolve to remember how great we feel time we exercise--the next time we're piling up excuses for why we can't work out.
8. The foods that are good for us actually leave us feeling good. Love how nature does that!
9. "The time is always right to do the right thing." Thank you Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr., for being as relevant as you've always been.
10. When life hands you lemons, roast them chickens and potatoes.
Sunday, January 27, 2013
Where We Belong: A Review
From Goodreads: Marian Caldwell is a thirty-six year old television producer, living her dream in New York City. With a fulfilling career and satisfying relationship, she has convinced everyone, including herself, that her life is just as she wants it to be. But one night, Marian answers a knock on the door . . . only to find Kirby Rose, an eighteen-year-old girl with a key to a past that Marian thought she had sealed off forever. From the moment Kirby appears on her doorstep, Marian’s perfectly constructed world—and her very identity—will be shaken to its core, resurrecting ghosts and memories of a passionate young love affair that threaten everything that has come to define her.
For the precocious and determined Kirby, the encounter will spur a process of discovery that ushers her across the threshold of adulthood, forcing her to re-evaluate her family and future in a wise and bittersweet light. As the two women embark on a journey to find the one thing missing in their lives, each will come to recognize that where we belong is often where we least expect to find ourselves—a place that we may have willed ourselves to forget, but that the heart remembers forever.
For the precocious and determined Kirby, the encounter will spur a process of discovery that ushers her across the threshold of adulthood, forcing her to re-evaluate her family and future in a wise and bittersweet light. As the two women embark on a journey to find the one thing missing in their lives, each will come to recognize that where we belong is often where we least expect to find ourselves—a place that we may have willed ourselves to forget, but that the heart remembers forever.
My Review: I was on the fence about reading this book since it is largely focused on adoption. I have found that books about adoption sometimes gloss over reality and it all ends up in a tidy little bow by the end.
The characters, while somewhat flat, are relatable. They feel the emotions one would expect them to feel. I found myself empathizing with almost all of them, oddly enough though, not with the adoptive mother. Her resentment of her daughter's birth parents is probably typical to some adoptions, but not to ours and so I had a tough time with her. I could understand her hesitation, but I felt she should have been more supportive of something that was so obviously important to her daughter.
The story moved at a decent pace, but I can't say it was a page turner. I enjoyed reading it slowly and thinking about the issues raised in the novel. I liked how the author slowly peeled back layers of the story a bit a a time. While most of it was predictable, it was still worth reading.
The book did have some short comings, mainly related to how adoption works. Kirby was 18 when the story takes place, so things may have changed between then and now. I am not sure how realistic it is that she was given Marion's address. The way she just showed up out of the blue seems to be most people's worst nightmare. I doubt either birth parents or adoptive parents would want to be surprised by someone on their doorstep.
Also, the way Marion kept the entire pregnancy a secret from everyone, including the birthfather Conrad was deplorable. It certainly made me think twice about a birthfather's rights, and I truly felt bad for his character.
Long story short, each and every adoption is different, and this books tells one story.
Thursday, January 24, 2013
5 Months Old!
It doesn't even seem possible that LX is already 5 months old! He is doing so great. He is ticklish and has the best belly laugh ever. He can turn himself over and he loves "standing" up when someone is holding him. We think he will walk before he crawls. He is working on sitting up with some help. He still loves books, talking, and music. He smiles so much and is still a great sleeper. We took him to Pennsylvania this weekend to visit my sister and her family, and he had a great time playing with his cousin James. He is super chatty and almost always is talking. He likes to sit at the dinner table with us when we are eating, and he talks away!
He doesn't go to the doctor this month (unless he gets sick, so hopefully not!), so I don't have any height or weight this month. He has been very healthy and we are so thankful for that! He is showing a couple of teeth buds on his bottom jaw. He drools a lot but seems to be OK with the slow arrival of his first teeth.
He is the best thing that has ever happened to us, and we are so happy!
Sunday, January 13, 2013
What I Love About Sundays
~ sleeping
~ eggs and home fries
~ not rushing
~ football
~ staying in PJs as long as I want to
~ pot roast in the crock pot
~ knowing that I don't have to go to work in the morning
~ the calm that has settled over our house
I hope your Sunday is relaxing and refreshing!
~ eggs and home fries
~ not rushing
~ football
~ staying in PJs as long as I want to
~ pot roast in the crock pot
~ knowing that I don't have to go to work in the morning
~ the calm that has settled over our house
I hope your Sunday is relaxing and refreshing!
Friday, January 11, 2013
Board Games
Dave and I are obsessed with board games. For him, it is the competitiveness and for me, it is the social aspect. Plus, they are just fun! We are lucky to have another couple who loves to play games just as much as we do, so we get to play a fair amount.
We've had quite a few favorites over the years, so I thought I would share them with you.
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