To write or not to write

One of my lifelong dreams is to author a book. I began writing shortly after I ended a difficult relationship with my college boyfriend.  I wrote some edgier vignettes and poems that were fairly good, but nothing I would want to turn into something bigger. I have toyed with the idea of a novel with a main character who would strike a resemblance to me. The problem with doing that is that I would not want to reveal some of the more interesting parts of my past, and those are the parts that would make an interesting story.

The other part I struggle with is what the book would be about.  What have I learned in my (gasp) almost 30 years that would make a compelling story? I think the seed idea is essential to telling a good story, and I frankly am at a loss for one. I have very little experience with creative writing. I have some non-fiction experience from college when I wrote for The State Times and The Freeman's Journal. Maybe a magazine article or a column would be a better place to start.  Maybe I should pay more attention to the essay contests that the magazines I read offer, and try one. I will never know unless I try.

Human Being or Human Doing?

This is another thought provoking question that has come in our Mindful Living class over the last two weeks. Our teacher argues (and I agree) that most of the time we are human doings. While it is sometimes impossible to avoid it, it is not a way to live. While I wholeheartedly agree with this idea, putting it into practice is much more difficult. Sometimes I get weighed down with what I "need" to do that I end up sacrificing what I want to do.  I have been trying to avoid some of the items on my to do list, but in the end, it only increases my anxiety. What do you do when you can't really delete items?  


I need to find a compromise. But how? In my mind, it is difficult to separate relaxing from laziness, idleness from wastefulness.  I know I need to re-charge, but I cannot stop my responsibilities so easily. There will always be work to do, clothes to wash, dogs to walk, and appointments to keep.  


I found this quote, and I agree with it. Now I need to embrace it!


"Rest is not idleness, and to lie sometimes on the grass under trees on a summer's day, listening to the murmur of the water, or watching the clouds float across the sky, is by no means a waste of time."  ~John Lubbock

This is it

That was one of the messages from our Mindful Living class that really hit home for me.  I am someone who is always looking for what comes next, which is NOT living in the present. Our teacher told us to stop looking for the next step, and to say, "this is it." This is where I am supposed to be and this is what I am supposed to be doing right now.

We were given homework this week as a way to incorporate what we have learned. My homework is to drive to work each day by taking a different route. The point is to break the auto-pilot behaviors in my day. I admit it has been a bit challenging for me to do this because I always take the direct (read: shortest) route. In a way, it seems silly to take the longer route. I admit that I am enjoying it. Yesterday, the sunrise was beautiful with the mist coming off the water. My drive to work is breathtaking, and yet I rarely take a breath to enjoy it. I also turned off the radio and was alone with my thoughts and feelings. While it was odd, it was quite peaceful. I did not think about work or my day, but rather I focused on my blessings.

I am trying to work in small moments into my day where I can just be. Just breath. It feels so good to take a small (2-3 minutes) total break and close my eyes. I jokingly call it my happy place, and indeed, it is. It is a place to stop being frantic, stop worrying about the future, stop trying to control what cannot be controlled. Sometimes, I just have to let life be what it will be. While it is terrifying, it is also wonderfully freeing.

My DIY

Inspiration:

Our variation:

More nursery pics!

Shelf? Check!

I am so loving it!

Sneak Peak

Just a few new nursery items!

We decided to use curtains to cover the closet instead of the boring white doors that came with the house. We will probably need white panels behind these sheers. (Source: Little Boutique, babiesrus.com)

After much searching, we finally decided on this! I love the openings and how it looks a bit funky.  I like the cubes because we can store books, our piggy bank, a picture frame, and toys! (Source: Closetmaid, amazon.com)

This shelf was originally purchased for our book shelf, but it is pink.  We had the idea to paint it white, which isn't as easy as we thought. It has taken multiple coats of primer, and still isn't looking great. Since it was only $50 at Target, we decided to keep painting!  We will use it in the closet for additional storage. Since we only have the dresser that is attached to the changing table, we thought extra storage would be useful. Once it is all finished, I will re-post.